Grab a cold one and pull up a chair mmkay? We need to have a little chat. Or rather, I need to give you a quick pep talk. It’s time to stop comparing yourself to others.
Perhaps you don’t even realize you’re doing it. Or maybe you do, and it just adds to the misery you feel as you continue the compare game. It’s one game that as long as you play – you will always lose.
Bottom line – it sucks, and you should stop that! There is no one else like you, and that is AWESOME! Perhaps my favorite quote that helps reel me back in to prevent me from comparing myself to others is this one:
“The world needs that special gift that only you have.” – Marie Forleo
You are different from everyone else. Celebrate that. You offer a unique perspective in this game called life. We should all be thanking you. If you are constantly comparing yourself, it means you aren’t happy with who you are. Why is that?
People are brought up to conform to society. If you don’t fit within society’s norms, you are looked upon disapprovingly. However, most people aren’t normal in the truest sense of the word. Everyone has quirks and idiosyncrasies. It’s these differences that allow us to find solutions to problems. It also keeps us from getting bored. Imagine if everyone were truly the same. There would be nothing new to discover about one another.
There are some reasons to conform. For instance, you need to follow the rules and laws of your country and community. Otherwise, you will suffer consequences for not doing so. Also, you want to treat others with respect so that they will hopefully return that respect. However, if you try to act in ways in which others believe you should, you aren’t going to live your life to the fullest.
That’s why you should get out of the habit of comparing yourself to others. When you do this, you are likely setting unrealistic expectations and will lead you to be disappointed. Comparing yourself to others will result in you resenting those people. They have their reasons for being the way they are, and it has nothing to do with you.
There are qualities you admire in others. There is nothing wrong with trying to adopt some of those admirable qualities for yourself. However, it shouldn’t get to the point where you are trying to redefine who you are to be like those people you admire. You aren’t them, and you never will be.
You have but a short time on this planet. If you spend most of that time trying to be like someone else, you are in for a rough ride. If you stick to who you are and find others willing to accept you for that, you are going to be more satisfied for most of that time you live.
Others will be happier with the real you as well. You won’t be a pretender. People see right through that kind of behavior. Just think about others who are not true to themselves. How long does it take you to see through that disguise?
So from this day forward, be true to you. Go forward owning your gifts, and being authentically you. Stop comparing yourself to others because like Steve Maraboli says:
“You have a unique gift to offer this world. Be true to yourself, be kind to yourself, read and learn about everything that interest you and keep away from people who bring you down. When you treat yourself kindly and respect the uniqueness of those around you, you will be giving this world an amazing gift…YOU!”